shows how little i know about sport.

Listening to the post-match wash-ups yesterday ( we won BTW, did u know?) I nearly ran off the road when they tipped Marsh to come in. Reason being the pitch in perth will be so flat they'll need another bowler. Me, I'd bring Maxwell in (he's a Victorian) and bat the fuckers out of the game. Not as if we're chasing a victory.












Cos we've got two already!:lmoa2:

Heard Marsh's shield figures today. He's actually gone ok. Problem is, as a bowler, he's just on the rebound from shoulder surgery and has sent down very few deliveries. There's been a myth in Aussie cricket since forever that we need an allrounder. The Poms, Japies, Kiwis, and curry eaters of all persuasions seem to find them, we never really do. We have batsmen who can bowl a bit (The Waughs, Bevo, Watto, Clarko for a bit, even Bobby fucking Simpson,) and the odd bowler who knocks up some runs on occasion (Warnie, Lyon, and a host of blustering quicks). What we have had is a line of keepers at #6 which we don't have now, who allowed us the luxury of an extra bowler when needed.

So the current crop of bowling all-rounders is: M. Marsh (1). Nobody (2) Agar hasn't gone on with it. He'll be a great trivia question in 10 years time.
and batting all-rounders: a few, headed by Maxwell, but his tweakers don't really worry anybody.
So pls selectors, abandon this futile quest and just pick the best 11 players. We got this far without an allrounder. Let's not fix what ain't broke.

Englands batting exposed for what it is. Very weak. If Root and Cook don't score heavily then we're screwed. When thats occurred in the recent past usually a combination of Moeen, Bairstow and the Tail have been good for helping put on a decent score. But thats not happened now.

Vince shouldn't be near a Test match ground never mind playing on one. Worst thing that could have happened is him getting a half decent score first knock, as that will almost certainly keep him in the team for the rest of the tour. Flattered to deceive. After his knock of 82 he now averages something like 23 in Tests. And he's batting at No 3 FFS!

Cant understand what Vince and Ballance are doing on this Tour. Stoneman might have what it takes to open, but he's far too fond of flashing the bat at the ball rather than looking to bat all day.

Obviously Stokes is a big miss. I never knew so many Aussies worked for the UK Police and the CPS as thats the only logical explanation for why this investigation (into fuck all) has taken so long.

Last ever Ashes Test at the WACA. Reg's mate Cooky's 150th Test. Aussies on a roll and expected to win. England under the pump and need to win or at least salvage a draw.


All of the above is stating the bloody obvious. Of course, I want the Baggy Greens to win but just had a princely $20 (pensioner bet) on England to win on Betfair at 5.3


Poms can spring a surprise and this Australian side is certainly not that good especially if Mitch Marsh is named in the team. Then again, I said the same thing 4 years ago on the last English tour when Mitchell Johnson was named in the Test team.




:wallbash:

Hope this is only muckraking, looking for a headline


Ashes Spot Fixing Claim












:sad:

Hey Forkey,



There was no need for Mitch Marsh. According to the Cricinfo app, we already had an allrounder in the team









dancing

In his first test, he was considered a leg-spin allrounder. Steve Waugh was also picked to be an allrounder at the start. Which just illustrates my point about the infatuation with finding a jack of all trades.

England now praying for rain. Malan and Bairstow did well after a shaky start then the last 6 wickets fall for 34 runs. FFS. Match turning collapse. Think the Aussies have enough now, maybe too many the way England have performed so far in this series.

And Baz was right that Mitch Marsh should never have been selected 180 odd n.o. Him and especially Smith should not play another match in this series. England might be in with a sniff then, but thats probably being over optimistic.

This



Jonathan Agnew has got it exactly right IMHO. He has to go



:out:

Does KP qualify for Australian citizenship?

I wrote this on Facebook a few minutes ago







Feeling gutted at the moment :sad:

Same here mate it's just so fucked it's hard to believe its happened to one of the sports I've followed all my life - Cunts :bigfinger

I’m shocked to say the least ..! Been watching this series and it’s been very feisty surprised it hasn’t came to blows to be honest the Aussie team seem to be out of control and Lehman moaning about the crowd giving his team too much stick are very contradictory pleased it not England involved in this especially coming off the back of an ashes series win would be tarnished , i’d love to know how long it’s bern going on with this lot

Hopefully Smith and those involved will never play international cricket again. To knowingly cheat just can't be tolerated. But what really gets me is how did they expect to get away with it? This is a high profile Test series every move made on the field is picked up on camera and analysed. In the last Ashes Test series held in England Sky had 40 plus cameras focussed on the field of play. Don't know how many the SA broadcaster would have but I would think 10 would pick nearly everything up. So how did they ever expect to get away with it? Are their brains up their fuckin arses or something? Their arrogance is absolutely staggering.

100% spot on with everything you say mate.

All those involved should be banned from all competitive cricket forever - No ifs or buts. They should also be required to hand in their Baggy Greens - I'm totally gutted over this despicable act.

Excellent article by Tracey Holmes on the ABC website today





:thumbsup:

I love this. Some bloke sent it to The Guardian not long before last night's press conference










:priest:

I just read an article on CricInfo today saying the current culture of the Australian cricket team is Steve Waugh's fault. The same article also calls Steve Waugh a cheat.


Written by a bloke called Osman Samiuddin who turns out to be a Pakistani cricket writer


Fancy a Pakistani labelling Steve Waugh a cheat? Obviously coming from the high moral ground of Pakistani cricket


dancing





Watched the NZ/England Test today from Christchurch. Good comeback by the Poms but the best thing for me was the lovely old-fashioned cricket ground. Far better than the soulless stadiums we use in Australia these days for Test cricket


Just my two bobs worth


:toot:

Actually Baz thats an interesting point. In Oz you have some massive grounds, more like Premier League Football stadia. There was talk of why England didn't have or build a 40,000 to 50,000 capacity purpose built cricket stadium. An opinion was formed that this wouldn't represent what English cricket traditionally stands for. The philosophy is you start with the pitch and pavilion and then evolve from there. Stands are added, as necessary, at various stages as the ground grows.

Best example is Lords where Victorian Architecture meets Modern. Relatively small playing area on a pitch that slopes down from The Grandstand to The Taverners Stand. Its all a bit eccentric really, mixed in with some good old fashioned snobbery from the MCC. Although I believe the SCG and MCG do have some old type stands and a scoreboard at one.

Anyway back on topic. After Smith bubbling on telly, well crocodile tears really, the attitude seems to be more of what you get from EPL Players etc who think they are blameless and are never accountable. Seems like its spread to cricket Down Under. Thing is they have been held to account by the Oz public and now must incur their wrath. This starts at the top though. Apart from the fact that this stuff should never have occurred once it was evident the following should have immediately resigned: Coach, Captain and Vice Captain as between them they are responsible for anything that every player gets up to on or off the field of play. To plead ignorance/innocence is pathetic. If you didn't know what was happening, your incompetent, if you did know then your held culpable.

It's all about the IPL at the moment. No other cricket happening other than the start of the English county season.


Have to say that I do enjoy watching the T20 game. Totally meaningless with zero team loyalty (for me) but good entertainment. I follow whoever is playing against Royal Challengers Bangalore coz they are captained by Virat Kohli. He may be the best batsman in the world but what a wanker. He can be so arrogant at times. Since he has taken over the Indian Test captaincy, he has never had the same team in consecutive matches. Obviously likes to assert his control over the team.


The big plus is getting to see a lot of players that you don't normally see in the international games. There is still life in a few of the old fellas too. Chris Gayle & Shane Watson both scoring tons in the last couple of nights. Gayle taking Rashid Kahn to the cleaners and hitting four consecutive 6's certainly put him in his place.


Getting a decent signal on my Android box. Watching it on Sky Sports Cricket channel in HD. Excellent picture and works 90% of the time. Listening to the English players in the studio during the breaks is OK too. Would have thought Bairstow should have been playing in the IPL.


Another plus is that it takes my mind off the Australian Test team. It still brings a tear to my eye when I think about what those three bastards have done. :angry:


On a lighter note, I still carry that piece of sandpaper in my wallet that Adam gave us earlier this month. Looking out for some yellow stuff as I want to have the real thing. Might come in handy one day.


dancing

been watching it myself baz,very entretaining and the crowd get right into it
that knock from gayle the other night was obscene
give me test cricket anyday but sadly i think in 10-20 years time you might only see a few countries playing it by then
fully agree on kohli,wanker of the highest order

Q: When is a ban not a ban?

A: When your name is Steve Smith




Steve Smith named as Marquee Player in Canadian T20 tournament


It seems he will be back playing internationally by the end of June



Excerpt from the article from the ABC website



Full article here




Can just imagine James Sutherland saying to him after the "ban" was dished out to him




What a fucking joke!!



:angry:

^
Funny how this "banning" thing has changed. In 1996 an English cricket pro, Ed Giddins, tested positive for cocaine. At the time he played for Sussex and appeared in a handful of Tests for England. Giddins thought he was only banned from First Class cricket, so as the season was approaching its end in England, he contacted a club in NZ that he had played for before as a pro to try and get a gig for the winter.

Initially the club were keen to take him on, especially as he was now a proven performer. However when they applied to register him they were informed that Giddins had a worldwide ban on him. Giddins wasn't aware of this so, his solicitor made further enquiries and he was in fact banned from every affiliated ground world wide. Not just for playing, but also as a spectator.

Basically he could only play/watch non organised cricket in local parks etc. Amazingly he saw his ban out and came back as a pro but his career was cut short with a shoulder injury. Giddins was interviewed by Paul Allott on Sky a few years ago and it was an amazing story. Giddins said during the ban he just practised bowling in a local park and, in the winter, on tarmac tennis courts. Allott said he would have packed in and done something else.

Different bans for different folks.

I don't know how many of you guys will be aware of the major drug scandal the enveloped Aussie Rules a few years ago (And continues to reverberate).
A couple of clubs had employed a "sports scientist" to oversee their recovery programs, one particular club being heavily exposed to his treatments . Turned out he had no real qualifications and was suspected of administering banned substances. After years of legal bickering the players involved were found to have no liability, but coaches and officials were banned/fined for improper governance.
A number of players left and joined other clubs. One of them, Stuart Crameri, joined a club that hadn't won a trophy of any sort in 60 years.
Before the new season started, WADA stepped in and handed out a 12 month suspension to 34 players at the club in 2012 (with one exception, who could prove he hadn't had a jab.)
So before he had played a game at the new club, Crameri had to sit out the season. Destiny is a bitch. The team made the finals, and despite being the underdog in all four matches, duly won the premiership. Crameri wasn't allowed inside the ground, not even as a spectator. Watched the game at home on TV. They've played like shit for the last two years.

And just for Bazz....you might have missed this: James Hird's house got broken into last week. Money, jewelry and his Audi were taken. A 15 year old has been arrested. Karma's a bitch too.

That's how a ban is supposed to work. Smith & co should not be allowed anywhere near a cricket ground. According to the BBC website, Warner is going to Canada as well. Unbelievable!!!


I love my horse racing. Due to the money involved, it's the dodgiest "sport" of the lot. In Australia, apart from jockeys getting suspended for bad riding practices, not a week goes by without some trainer getting done for giving a horse illegal substances or others going outside of the rules. Some make the news, most don't.


James McDonald is one of the leading jockeys in Australia. He was Godolphin's main jockey. He just came back from serving an 18-month suspension. His crime? Putting $1,000 on a horse that he was riding in a race. He earns millions of dollars a year yet jeopardised that by doing a stupid thing. Money makes people do strange things. During his 18 month ban, he was not allowed to attend any race track except to ride in a few trials in the weeks leading up to his return to riding..


Ciaron Maher is a leading trainer in Melbourne. He has just returned from a 6-month ban. His crime? He did not know the true ownership of one of the horses he trained. He was lucky as all his horses and his staff were transferred to another trainer while he served his ban. Again, while he was banned, he was was not allowed near any racetrack or stables. Not even allowed to communicate with the bloke who took over the training of his horses. I doubt that happened but you get the point.



Australians love their sport but get caught cheating or breaking the rules and you are dealt with harshly. Quite right too. That's why it galls me to see Smith & Warner being allowed to play anywhere while they are supposedly banned.



Rant over

Thing is what exactly are Smith and Warner banned from? Just international cricket? I see Boof has returned to the Aussie set up.

The upcoming England/India Test schedule. 5 Tests in 6 weeks. All at the end of a packed season.

Crikey, some English blokes are going to be worn out






Too much cricket?


:dunno:

All sold out too might go 5th test for a day when I get back from los

Yet we are continually told Test Match cricket is fucked nobody's interested in it. There would be even more interest in cricket in England if at least live Test Match cricket was free to view.

Maybe this cunt can go into the Aussie team room and give them some tips on how to get the ball to reverse swing



Warner to Commentate in England



From the article




Poor Davy boy is hurting, is he? A couple of hundred lashes is what he really needs. He should not be allowed anywhere near a cricket ground. This is the weakest so-called "ban" I have ever seen.



The three of them should have been banned for life from anything to do with cricket plus warned off entering any cricket ground as well. It still brings a tear to my eye to think about the dishonour they have brought to the Baggy Green.


:crying:

England lose to Scotland. FFS fancy losing to the Porridge Gobblers.

WTF? Only one player from NSW in the current Australian ODI squad playing in England. We're fucked

:ohno:


No Smith & Warner (obviously), no Starc, Cummins or Hazelwood. Nearly a completely new side. Happy to see a lot of the new blokes get a go at the top level and hope that they will be competitive.



On another note, I have great respect for the BBC Sports website which I read a lot but they dropped a clanger (well to us Aussies it is) when reporting on the current ODI series between England & Australia



From the article




Full article is here



Trust me, there will not be a Baggy Green seen in this series. It is worn only in Test matches :thumbsup:

England v. Australia 4th ODI Emirates Riverside
 

Not a bad effort by the Aussies, and they added 2 more runs, to end a mere 171 runs short of Englands first dig in the previous ODI at Trent Bridge.



Impressive start by England.



Not looking good for the Aussies.



The Fat Lass sat next to me was clearing her throat at this point.



Whitewash should be completed tomorrow. If anybody wants any shite photos taken, feel free to PM me. Very reasonable rates (2,000 baht ST, 3,500 baht LT. No BF.)

Whitewash completed today, 5-0 to England. Made hard work of the run chase though. England better side throughout, but the Aussies got on a losing streak and couldn't shake it off. Not all bad for Australia though that Billy Stanlake looks really good, could develop into a top class opening bowler.

First off, well done to the Poms. They beat us fair and square. Pun intended. The first whitewash of any Australian cricket team by an Eglish team it seems. It only took 140+ years :banana:


Now they have to do it against a full-strength India in the ODI's and Tests in the coming weeks plus of course, the World Cup next year. Interesting times ahead for them.


On the flip side, this was an experimental Australian ODI squad made up of many fringe players who performed well in the last Big Bash in Australia and the recent IPL. Good to see them getting a go but I doubt many of this lot will be in the squad for the WC next year.

I thing Bairstow hit peak form this past few weeks and it remains to be seen if he can repeat it in the future. Then Roy and Hales weighed in which set things up for England. I don't think the Aussies were as bad as the 5-0 scoreline suggests, its just they couldn't get any consistency together and it all went tits up from there.

Stokes cleared of affray today should never have been dropped from England team until proven guilty of any offence , wouldn’t be surprised if the ECB still ban him

The whole thing has been a long drawn out farce. Seems all the pissartists involved in the scrap just wanted to put the whole thing behind them and move on. But the Police and CPS had to drag the whole thing out for months until its inevitable conclusion. Totally pointless.

Who knows what the ECB will do. But its bound to be stupid.

In other news Durham CCC have signed Cameron Bancroft for the 2019 season to play in all formats. Very controversial. Could have been worse with Smith or much worse with Warner but its a close call.

Stokes replacing Curran is another strange one nothing like knocking a young lad after the hard work he’s put in